The Saddest Day

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Just after sunset on Saturday, my mother left this life.

Her decline had been long and slow, but the final chapter of her life was very short. It was just before Easter that she ceased to recognise the people around her – even her daughter and her beloved dog – and so I have to say that it is a blessing that she went quickly and so very peacefully that I wasn’t quite sure that she had gone.

I’m working through all of the many things that have to be done, but I am shattered.

I was so lucky to have a wonderful mother and father, and a lovely brother, and now they are all gone.

I had so many shared memories that are mine alone now.

I know that I have to come to terms with this, I know that I am lucky to have The Man of the House and my lovely Briar, but it’s going to take time.

I just don’t have any words right now ….

60 thoughts on “The Saddest Day

  1. Jane, I too am so very sorry for your loss. Nothing can prepare us for this, I think, whether it is slow or sudden. And having to deal with all the practicalities can be overwhelming at a time like this. You are in my thoughts & prayers.

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  2. Jane, I am so very sorry for your loss. I haven’t had any words for some time now, myself; sometimes the heart just needs a silent space for a time. Just want you to know your grief is shared by many. I think I would have loved your mother, she sounded delightful from the things you have written about her and if you ever want to share any of your memories to a sympathetic and interested listener please consider me. We all have different ways we cope with the loss of our parents or loved ones, but, in the end, we find a network of caring hearts ready to help. Hugs to you.

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  3. My condolences to you Jane. Hold your memories close and may they bring you comfort now and always. As we say in my tradition, “May her memory be eternal.”

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  4. Jane, I am so sorry for your loss. Both of my parents died last year; my mother’s decline was particularly swift. So while every person’s situation is unique, I know something of what you are feeling. May fond memories of your mother, father, and brother continue to sustain you. ❤

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  5. In a very small way, we’ve shared some of your memories. Oh, Jane, it has always been uplifting to see how you loved and cared for you mom…from the sweaters you knit for her birthdays to the visits you told us about. Please know that we’re holding you in our hearts.

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  6. Oh, Jane, I am so very very sorry. there can be no words, but I hope that, somehow, knowing that people you have never met, as well as those you know ‘in real’ are feeling for you, can in some way offer tenderness, in a time and place which must feel bereft, and bleak. Much warmth to you

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  7. Somehow this spring I am hearing of many crossings, from friends like you who I only know through our words as well as those I know in “real life.” As the visible signs of love and rebirth spring outwardly we are sometimes challenged by these events of loss and sadness. May you find strength to carry you through this difficult time, knowing that our thoughts are with you.

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  8. Big Hug Jane! I was there not too long ago, when I lost my mum and I know how you feel!! No words can help make things better! But trust me when I say, time gives back what its taken in memories and wisdom! I will remember you and your family in my prayers! Hang in there!

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  9. Dear Jane, I am sorry for your loss. Your mother sounded wonderful . I am going back to northern Michigan next month to say goodbye to my own mother who is now 91 and failing. I am glad you have such wonderful memories, they will keep you warm and make you laugh in future days. Be kind to yourself.

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  10. So very sorry to hear of your loss, Jane. Please know I offer my thoughts and prayers to you. May the memories and lovely times shared with your Mother grant you some peace. It is a difficult time – please take care of yourself.

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  11. Having recently suffered a bereavement myself, I share your feelings of loss. I hope that time will be kind and help you find solace in ways that are just right for you.
    If I may make one suggestion it is this: people do not send sympathy cards so much these days, instead they write kind and thoughtful words of comfort here in the blogosphere. Keep them. I copied mine using print screen, and printed them out on photo paper, and put them into a scrapbook about my father. On days when I am feeling low, I read them again and again.
    Take care of yourself, and cherish your memories.

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  12. So, so sorry for your loss Jane. We just buried my dad this afternoon after a long struggle and decline. The rational side of me says that he is no longer suffering and is at rest. The other part of me cannot believe that the world will continue without him. 83 years for him was not nearly enough. You are in my thoughts and prayers Jane and. Wish your dear mother a peaceful rest.

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  13. My most sincere condolences. I have lost both of my parents and my heart goes out to you. May the memories of happy times together console you. I hope, when you are ready, that you might share some memories of your family with us.

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  14. I am so sorry for your loss. May the comfort of memories help with the pain of this trial at this time in your life. In future those memories become your treasure chest into which you may place your hand and hold a handful of the most sparkling jewels which have adorned your life this far and which will continue to do so in the future.

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  15. Jane, I am so sorry for your loss. The words you shared last night are poignant and beautiful, even in the depths of your sadness. I wish you resilience and strength as you negotiate this very difficult time.

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  16. I am so sorry for your loss, Jane, but pleased that your mother’s departure was as easy for her as it seems to have been. The Bears and I are holding you and Briar in our thoughts.

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  17. How strange and disorienting it is to suddenly feel one’s self is so alone in the wake of a loss. Nothing is the same and, yet, so many things are, which somehow seems both threatening and comforting. How fortunate that it seems to have been a peaceful event for her, and how fortunate that you’ve got so many wonderful memories, but sympathies to you and yours as you adjust to your loss(es).

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